Tuesday, June 30, 2009

Arab Stereotypes

People have been manipulated by the media into believing what they see in films about Arabs. There has been an Arab stereotype in the West about how they think Arabs are. To a majority of Westerners, an Arab...
  • Lives in a tent in the middle of a vast desert filled with sandstorms.
  • Has ten wives each of which wears a burqa and has ten children.
  • Wears a red keffiyeh and has an uncombed beard from one ear to the next.
  • Goes around his daily life with a suicide vest strapped to his chest.
  • Rides on a decorated but smelly camel from one village to the next.
  • Has wives that go around the tent holding large pots of water on their heads.
  • Lives on nothing but falafel for his breakfast, lunch and supper.
  • Carries a sword on his back or on his waist and uses it to behead people.
  • Has extremist views on killing all the West and burning their bodies.
  • Earns a living by robbing nearby villages late at night.
  • Writes in hieroglyphics and worships large statues of ancient pharaohs.
  • Has a name of "abu" followed by either "abdul", "mohammad", or "mustafa".
  • Come to the west with the only intention of blowing up a crammed bus.
Here's a video from Queen Rania's Youtube channel about Arabs in the west and how people there see them.

Thursday, June 25, 2009

The Blame

From time to time, you will meet people that in certain situations will have messed up, but will put the blame on everything possible except themselves. Here are a few examples from day to day life were people have put the blame on everything but themselves.


Speeding Drivers

I was moving with the flow of traffic. I needed to get to the shop to buy falafel for my hungry sons. I didn't know because my speed meter is broken. I didn't sleep last night properly. I was catching up with a wedding. I was in a wedding driving like a maniac and honking randomly. My foot slipped on the gas pedal. I'm a stupid taxi driver with no manners or respect for others.

The reality: the guy saw the speed limit sign but couldn't care less, he thinks he owns the road legally and he can go as fast as he likes.


Rejected Brides

She has no money. She comes from a poor family. She is cursed. She doesn't want to get married. She has been envied by everyone in her university. We need to pay the other family more. She does not own a large car with a personal driver. She was cursed long ago by that old witch with a large nose. She was born on the same day that we saw the crow on our windowsill. Our Filipino maid wrapped her photo in bandages and cooked them at midnight with a newts eye and a mosquito's brain.

The reality: the bride is uglier than an ogre, but the family will lie to themselves and blame it on the innocent maid trying to earn a living.


Iranian Elections

The vote was rigged. The votes were miscounted. There were more votes than the population. There was a foreign intervention. The vote was rigged by Israel. False Twitter accounts were made on the internet to aid protesters. There is a media clampdown to stop the world knowing what really happened. Britain and America had something to do with the rigged vote. The vote did not turn out how we wanted it to be and that means it is unfair.

The reality: when will we Arabs ever have elections that come out with everyone happy? Problem is, if Mousavi won, supporters of Ahmadinejad would have protested saying it was an unfair election.

Tuesday, June 23, 2009

Fox Attacked Obama



Do you remember the Obama media hype was before the elections? But what's more important, is how the media covered him. Many news channels claim to be unbiased no matter what the coverage, and will report all news without giving opinions and will verify all sources claims.

That’s were Fox news comes in, in which post election it was extremely against Obama. Although not directly stating so, it was clearly obvious that it was backing his rival John McCain throughout the entire elections. Video after video on the internet shows how this happened.

Here is a one of those videos from YouTube. Fox news, which claims to provide balanced and unbiased news coverage, clearly did not live up to that claim post election. Its news reporters freely gave their opinions when they were supposed to be reporting, and what's more alarming is what they picked on.

The channel mocked Obama when seen in a swimming shorts, found the middle name of the president so alarming, claimed he did nothing for black people, picked on the fact he was a cigarette smoker and said he went to a extremist 'madrasa' when he was young. As a side note, always watch Al-Jazeera International for fair news coverage in English.


Monday, June 22, 2009

Dabshaat: Part Three

مرة أستاذ عبقري راح على مدرسة للمتميزين منشان يختبرهم.

دخل على الصف و سألهم: إيش في إشي بطير؟

رفع ولد إيدو و قال: الحمامه يا أستاذ

قال الأستاذ: غلط. شو بشتغل أبوك؟

رد الطالب: دكتور يا أستاذ

قال الأستاذ: شايفين، إذا إبن دكتور و هيك

رفع طالب اخر إيدوا و قال: العصفور

رد الأستاذ: غلط! إيش بشتغل أبوك؟

قال الطالب: مهندس

قال الأستاذ: إغس، إذا إبن مهندس و هيك

طالب دواوين رفع إيدوا و قال: التمساح يا أستاذ

قال الأستاذ: يلعن شكلك، شو بشتغل أبوك

رد الطالب: مدير المخابرات يا أستاذ

قال الأستاذ: على فكره، التمساح إذا شد حيلو بقدر يطير

Saturday, June 20, 2009

Jordans Response To Swine Flu



As swine flu cases outbreak in Jordan, there is obviously going to be some gossip about it from your average Jordanians. Here are what I guess will be some quotes about swine flu from special types of Jordanians. I have written them in Arabic so I don't transliterate them and lose all meaning.

"نعم؟ إنفلونزا الخنازير؟ إيش هاظ؟ ولا؟ لاتكون بتسب علي؟ والله لأورجيك يإبن الـ" – the dumb teenager's response

"لا يجوز توخي الحذر من هذا المرض لأنه من الله و هو سيحمينا من كل الأمراض و بدون أن نفعل أي شيء، ومن لم يقتنع سيعد كافرا وسيرجم حتى الموت " – the extreme sheikh's response

"يا زلمه أنا أصلا صار معاي هذا المرض من ألف سنه و والله إزهقتوا و جسمي إتعود عليه" – the village idiot response

"يا ويلي الله يستر إمبارح شعرت بإرتفاع ضغطي و أظن أنو صار معاي المرض، من يوم ما قربت من البسه الميته في الشارع الأسبوع الماضي" – the paranoid's response

"والله هذه من علامات الساعة و جائني فلان في منامي و أخبرني أن هناك واحده مسخها الله إلى دجاجة مسلوخة بسبب عصيان الله" – the young annoying sheikh's response

"ولك يا عمي أنا ما بصيبني أي مرظ منشان أنا أبوللمرظ، ولك أنا المرظ بنفسو، ولك أنا الدواوين الصح، أوووو" – the taxi driver's response

"والله المرض كللو إشاعة إكبيره معمولة من الحكومة منشان يرفعوا سعر الدجاج و اللحم، والله كنت عارف من زمان بس خفت أحكي لحد يفكروني مجنون" – the conspiracy theorist response

"هو في إشي بحياتنا صح، لا مصاري ولا شغل ولا سيارة ولا أمن، والله الدنيا زفت بس شو إنسوي، الله يعينا – هلا عمي!" – every other Jordanian

In Case Of Fire Don't Use Twitter



Strangest. Fire guidance. Ever.


[source: digg]